Why is having a personal stylist a good idea?
You are an organised and intelligent person who uses a recipe book (or Tik Tok now!) to help you cook, you go to the doctor when you are ill, you may even seek advice from personal trainers when it comes to exercise.
Why have you not invested in guidance for the very fundamental part of daily life, getting dressed?
So many more ‘ordinary’ people have access to generic styling hints and tips because social media has created so many ‘stylists’. Good style is no longer something that only famous or rich people have access to and so, in turn, society is under so much pressure to maintain a high standard of dress all the time. For some, this seems out of reach as they feel worlds apart from those who look good.
Can you guess who feels this the most? Women.
If it is not already obvious I am a proud feminist and this realisation is the main catalyst for me to launch my own business. I truly believe that the fashion industry can be so cruel and non-inclusive, so to counteract this I offer services that meet the needs of real women that deserve to look and feel their best.
Welcome to my first blog…
I really wanted to use this space to explain more about me and my own relationship with style as a means to explain why I believe so passionately in empowering all women to feel sensational through effortless style. I hope by the end of this piece you realise why personal styling is such a worthwhile investment whilst recognising that you deserve to reap the benefits of looking and feeling good every single day.
I want to start right back in 1995 when I began secondary school and my relationship with my body changed. For the first time, and not the last, I experienced the shame of being in a changing room when nothing fits. I do not have fond memories of shopping with my friends as teenagers as they just could not comprehend that the reason I was not trying anything on was because the shop did not stock my size! I used to feel so much larger, and therefore uglier, than my friends and it was excruciatingly painful. I did spend my teenage years in the 90’s, an era that did nothing for anyone’s confidence, but I honestly felt so alone. For reference, at that time I was devastated that I was a size 14 and am now a happy size 18.
What changed?
I obviously grew up, and experience is a wonderful thing. I also ‘did the work’ and fought the demons in my head, which slowly turned me into someone who loved to shine bright in what I wore, grab attention and the limelight! I realised that style is so much more than a size on a label. As long as I wear flattering cuts and colours I actually look great, and I feel pretty good too.
My confidence definitely has ups and downs.
I currently still work in education (alongside personal styling) and became a senior leader at the age of 33. No-one told me how to dress for authority. I was suddenly projected to the forefront of assemblies, meetings with parents, governors and leading open days. Let me tell you now… I felt extremely self conscious! I was scruffy, only comfortable in trainers and I didn’t even own a blazer… I needed a wardrobe to match my status. The moment I changed my style I began to feel so much more confident and powerful; my success just multiplied.
When I first became a mum no-one told me how to dress for my new body shape. I did what I know so many women try to do, that is, get back into my old clothes asap. I failed drastically. I was utterly embarrassed and self conscious about how I looked. I just did not know where to turn. Not many of my friends had children at the time and no one was really speaking about this element of motherhood, it was all about the kids or about losing the baby weight. It was only when I decided to get to grips with myself and buy new clothes that suited my life-style and my new body that I found my mojo again. I wish someone had told me to embrace my new life sooner. The first year of motherhood is really tough and mine was definitely made tougher because not enough people were talking about the need to style yourself for your new life.
Finally, I am here to talk about another fundamental part of life, age. All of a sudden I got older and no one had told me I may need to adjust my style. I was stuck in this middle ground between wanting to look like I used to and also wanting to look like the person I am now. I felt like a yo-yo. One day jeans and trainers and another day in a formal suit. I did not feel genuine in either look. Over time I slowly realised that my style is much like my personality, fully adaptable to the situation I am in. I am lucky to have a multifaceted life and therefore why wouldn't my wardrobe have these layers too. Once I realised who I was in my various roles; the mother, the employee, the sofa dweller, the wine connoisseur… I developed a style around those elements. Much like a uniform, I apply my wardrobe to the situation I am in. It has revolutionised the speed at which I get dressed as well as how confident I feel at any event. I have also managed to avoid trying to emulate outfits of people who do not look like me or live a life that is in any way similar to mine… so really I have also saved myself so much heartache and money!
Do any of these experiences sound familiar?
Your wardrobe is cluttered and overflowing, but you still feel like you have nothing to wear.
You find it hard to throw away clothes because you're emotionally attached to them.
You hate shopping so you are stuck with an outdated and unflattering wardrobe.
You buy all the latest trends but you only wear them once because they are not really you!
If you agreed with any of the above statements I promise it’s not your fault.
I WAS THERE TOO!
Like I said, the fashion industry does nothing to help us build style and confidence. In fact, it does the opposite, by pumping out looks and marketing ‘must-buy’ garments without even considering the diverse society we are in. It is no surprise that so many of us have a fundamentally negative relationship with a wardrobe full of clothes we chose to buy. It doesn’t have to stay like this… There are now so many options on how to get advice on style.
Social media is full of influencers who can sell you the latest trends and offer discount codes but in reality they are only really fuelling capitalism, they do not care about you. When I talk about personal styling it is more than just clothes, it is about developing a deep connection with yourself. I know that how you feel is massively affected by how you look and realistically getting 1-1 support from an expert is far more impactful than working with online models that are not living the same life or having the same experiences as you.
It is sad that no one teaches us these important messages when we are young and impressionable. For years women have been brainwashed into the idea that we need to look good for the male gaze in order to gain status. THANKFULLY, this view is so outdated now and therefore, it's the perfect time to think about getting some expert help to level up your style and feel fully empowered!
If this blog has tickled your taste buds, and you want to know more, why not book in for a complimentary style chat.
We can get to know each other before you decide whether you are ready to invest in a personal stylist.
Thanks for reading my very first blog!
Love Jess x
